assault
Sexual Violence as Entertainment – Moving Beyond the Shock Factor
I don’t watch much TV but I have got to admit, I love watching Law and Order SVU. Law and Order Special Victims Unit follows the New York Police Dept. Sex Crimes Unit. The show just finished its Fifteenth Season. Overall I have been impressed by the way the show has brought awareness to the complexities of trauma and highlighted the way victims deserve to be treated by the police. I have a lot of respect for Mariska Hargitay who plays the main character Detective Olivia Benson. Mariska started her own foundation to help survivors.
Despite my love for watching Law and Order SVU, I have noticed a gradual change in the nature of the crimes portrayed and it got me thinking. As the seasons move on, the focus on sexual abuse or assault has evolved into explicit story lines filled with extremely violent sexual crimes and horrific sexual exploitation. While I value the awareness created by covering such stories, I wonder if there is something more going on. Has the violence and cruelty of the stories increased because we are becoming desensitized to the horrors of sexual violence in itself and need a more gruesome story to entertain/shock us?
Have you ever wondered if the same thing is happening to us as we learn more and more about sexual violence? I remember when there was a large market for books written about people’s stories of childhood sexual abuse and people were horrified by these stories. Does sexual abuse still shock us? Is sex trafficking the new sexual abuse? I hope they are both seen as horrific but I know that the more stories I hear the less shocked I become and the risk of wrongly trivializing less extreme experiences becomes greater.
When we hear about the cruelties going on in the world, we are shocked and rightly so! But when we depend on shock to rally a response we do a disservice to our cause. To depend on the shock factor when addressing sexual violence is playing into society’s insatiable appetite for bigger and better or in this context younger, more violent, and more horrific. To do so puts the victims of sexual violence in a competition to decide who is more deserving of compassion and help. If you have experienced sexual violence no matter how old you were, how often it happened, if it was in a war zone, in your community or in a brothel, it was wrong, horrific and worthy of outrage. Friends, don’t let your response to sexual violence become as fleeting as the emotion of shock. A victim’s experience is horrific no matter how “tame” or “extreme” their story may seem. Their stories are not entertainment; it’s their reality. This reality can be changed but not through emotions, instead through unconditional community commitment. What are your thoughts? Feel free to comment below!
Together We Can- Offering Hope to One Girl At A Time
This past month has been busy with university exams, speaking at events, planning events and planning world domination (just kidding on the last part, kind of…) But seriously, you know those times when your so busy you think your brain will explode?
That was me: super busy, super tired, and quite honestly super discouraged. But then I met a lady we will call Dee. Dee introduced herself to me and then launched into stories about work, life and everything in between. I watched part exhausted and part in awe of her energy and passion as she told me amazing stories from her life. There was a warm fierceness about her that drew me in. Then Dee stopped, then asked me, “So what do you do?”
I told her about going to university, keeping busy and slipped in my desire to helping woman and girls. I told her that most recently I had been focusing on helping the sexually exploited both in Canada and SE Asia. Dee stopped. She grabbed me, hugged me and wept. “Thank you, thank you, I was trafficked as a sex slave when I was young, thank you for helping us!” Dee now a grown woman, free from the sex industry, held me in her arms and thanked me over and over. Of course, I cried.
Its unexpected times like those that keep me going. It is not like I have bust into brothels to rescue child prostitutes or stormed into rebel camps to rescue abducted girls but Dee reminded me that the little acts do matter. There are so many woman and girls experiencing all different forms of sexual violence, it’s overwhelming! But when we put faces to each of these woman, we are all drawn into contributing what we can and it all makes a difference!
I have had the privilege of getting to know 16 year old Grace. Grace is an incredible young woman, but she also represents your average teen. I say that because Grace is not necessarily different from any other teen accept that she has chosen to do some extraordinary things in the midst of ordinary life. Have you heard of rainbow loom? I hear it’s the latest craze! Well Grace started a project called Bracelets for Asia, she has been making rainbow loom bracelets to give to teens in SE Asia who have been forced into sexual slavery! What a creative and effective project!
Grace is using her context to make a face to face impact with teens halfway across the world. Grace sees each of those girls sold into slavery as a teen like herself who she might not be able to rescue but she can let them know they are cared for, and that brings hope. Grace’s project has caught on and now over a hundred bracelets have been made! Not only will girls in SE Asia receive a symbol of friendship and value but everyone making the bracelets are learning about the problems of sexual exploitation!
Meeting Dee this week reminded me of the importance of putting faces to a cause. Friends, Sexual Violence is a big issue representing so many faces; don’t be discouraged by the enormity of the problem. Instead, be like Grace, look around you and do something (however small it may seem) to help. I assure you if we all do something with the resources we have, we will make a difference!
If you would like to contribute bracelets to Grace’s project email me: jane@hopeforher.ca
Hope for Her 